I kid myself.
All I managed to do in the shower tonight was to work my way through my current playlist of Shower Diva tunes. Including, but not limited to, What's goin' on? (Four Non Blondes), Unchained Melody (The Righteous Brothers... I know, who am I kidding?), Crazy (Patsy Cline) and The Raiders of The Lost Ark (theme tune - because no amount of steam seems capable of dislodging that damn tune from my head at present).
Before our renovations, when our bathroom was a deep, green hole in the middle of the Fibro, my shower concerts were not really a problem. There were no windows and nobody could hear me over the rattly old ventilation fan anyway.
Now that we have a pristine, white bathroom on the edge of the house, with a large window, I'm fairly sure that my neighbours are becoming all too familiar with the Shower Diva (and probably snickering behind the fence as we speak...).
But I care not. The Shower Diva has not one jot on the Callas of the Washing Line, who favours American folk tunes (a la O Brother Where Art Thou?) and is outside strutting her stuff (next to the very same fence) on a regular basis.
At least the Callas of the Washing Line
Kids herself not, her purpose is not great,
Just ask her and she'll tell you straight out, Sir
I like to sing, in the sun, and breathe, mate.
Aren't you glad you don't live next door to the Fibro?
Are you a shower singer? What songs are on high rotation at your place? Have you ever tried to write anything in iambic pentameter (I don't recommend it)?
[image: I need me a shower curtain like this one from Amazon.]
Hello,
ReplyDeleteI am Simon Cowell’s neighbour’s sister’s friend’s gynaecologist and the other night I was walking past a stunning pink fibro when I heard the most enchanting sounds coming from what looked like a bathroom window.
I wondered at first if I was passing the house of Patsy Cline or Linda Perry or perhaps even Tim Minchin, but as I listened I realised that I was listening to something completely new. Something exciting and fresh. I’ve rarely felt so inspired. In a daze I grabbed a ladder and started up to have a look through the window, so I could catch a glimpse of this next big star and what did I see?
Bugger all, sadly – the room was steamed up like a Finnish sauna. Then I fell off the ladder and had to leg it.
Anyway…
I spent some time googling “Crazy bathroom girl unchained” and found some very interesting sites but then, after three hours, I found you here!!
I reckon I can get you a record deal easily, just pop into my clinic and I’ll even give you a free check up while you sign the papers – can’t say fairer than that, can I?
Thanks –
Glen
Head dipper at scrapenwipe clinic
Now how could I refuse an offer like that...
ReplyDeleteLOL. No way can I beat that first comment. So I will just admit that I am a chronic shower diva and the neighbours on that side (open bathroom window facing their patio with usually open door onto their kitchen and living room) don't really speak to us and give me somewhat unusual looks.
ReplyDeleteYou know, I actually wouldn't mind that sort of music collection coming from my next door neighbour. And when it comes to soulful "Oh Brother Where Art Thou?" tunes, I'd be happy to do that harmony for you.
ReplyDeleteIt's been a while, I've been stalking but not commenting. But I have a lovely image of you getting down in the shower. And rocking it.
xx
Haha, this is a great post, I laughed... hard. I am more a singer in the car kinda gal, but I do rely on the shower to wash away stale and crusty thoughts and reinvigorate my senses. I do think up blog posts in there and am forever thinking up ways of making a quick buck (of which I never really MAKE a quick buck from). In other words, it's my thinking sanctum and I love it! I think it's wonderful that you like to sing though and a new bathroom is a perfect excuse to sing high and loud. Fab shower curtain pictured too by the way xo
ReplyDeleteI have long thought there should be some sort of device that can telepathically transport my shower-inspired words straight to the computer. I can never remember those "brilliant" ideas once I've gotten out. Don't know that I'd want my singing coming through it though...
ReplyDeleteNo and No. I cannot sing at all. (I do do, however, the occasional car & kitchen radio singlaongs. Only when alone. I am woman, hear me roar...)
ReplyDeleteI can't believe you have the same shower songs...
ReplyDeleteHa ha great post! Awesome first comment from Glen too! I am really badat remembering words to songs so I generally sing old 80's tuned which Iactually listened to over and over and wrote the words down to. Manic Monday gets a look in The EVERY Monday and The Cures Friday I'm in love gets a look in EVERY Friday. How predictable am I ?
ReplyDeleteI am guilty of singing anywhere and everywhere. Sad but true because I can't actually sing very well. I know this because I have recorded myself on my iPhone and played it back. Bad, really bad. But it doesn't stop me! I love to sing!
ReplyDeleteYes, whatever's on the radio or in my head because I of course rock everything, and no! Thanks for the (non-)recommendation!
ReplyDelete702 is hosting a band comp for 'never were's. I reckon you should pull a band together (I know a few locals you could join with!), put a demo together and have a crack. Deadline is Friday. That is at least two showers away and a whole heap of trips to the washing line, right? Do not be fooled people. She sings almost as well as she writes x
ReplyDeleteOh Brother Where Art Thou? I LOVE that movie! The songs are fabulous.
ReplyDeleteI don't sing, well, not out loud anyway. Not in the shower or anywhere else. I don't want to scare myself. Others would probably have heart attacks from laughing so much.
No songs in our bathroom. My shower is all business. I don't sing or hum, and there's no CD player/iPod speakers/radio.
ReplyDeleteI sing lots in the car though.
I get the guilts about wasting water... so studio diva I am! Luckily, we're on a big block and the neighbours are nowhere within hearing - although then they'd realise I sing better than Grace Kelly in High Society.
ReplyDelete